W4

I can't believe its week 4 already. I feel a bit 'off key' at the moment, not a good start (again) to the week. Still keeping up with juicing and eating salads and blood type related food. Home yoga practice I still find rather tough. I'm having a little trouble juggling work, studies and exercise. Odd, exercise (health in general) should be the top of my list. In essence, without health, you really can't do much. I wonder why I find it difficult to put my own health first. Why is it the last on my list of things to do?

Day 22 - Monday (20/5/2013) 

I tried out Selina's Intermediate class today. I must say, I love how cool and relaxed she is. Her instructions are precise and she helped me (many times) adjust my poses. I'm not used to her class (yet!) but I plan to go for her Saturday Intermediate class soon. 

I'm beginning to realize that each instructor has their strengths and it might be best that I go for every one of them instead of sticking and hooking on to one. I think many might find it difficult to try out other instructors apart from the ones they are used to. Sometimes it could just be a matter of timing. But yes, I strongly suggest trying out all the instructors. Step outside the comfort zone. Hope that makes sense. 

Selina pointed out in her class as well that if we start yawning, it's most likely because we haven't been breathing well throughout the class. It's really not about not having enough rest, it's yes, the fact that I don't breathe well. What do I mean by that? I notice I tend to breathe rather fast when I'm struggling with poses, I should actually be more calm in terms of my breathing instead. I notice I tend to hold my breathe as well at times, totally not on purpose. For some reason, I forget that I have to breathe! (giggles).



Day 23 - Tuesday (21/5/2013) 

I've been researching how to do Titibhasana. I think this might be the hardest pose I'd have to accomplish doing. I thought headstand would be hard but then I tried it out, tried the technique Regine often teaches, then I was like 'Whoah, turns out I CAN do it, it's just that I was too afraid to even TRY'!

Jo, showed me how to do Titibhasana just before work started. She says that my hands should be positioned a little further back (instead of just behind the heels). She says it's easier to lift off (especially for me, my size I mean). Something about being more balanced and that I won't fall back as much. I have yet to try it out. I'm still working on my chaturanga and working on building my core.

Had tuna corn sandwich for dinner. I'm actually loving eating healthy. For some reason (I reckon it's lack of discipline), if I wake up in the middle of the night, my auto pilot reaction is to hunt for food (in the fridge). But of course, I snack of healthier food like fruits now, but I know eating in the middle of the night is not good in general. Not sure what to do about this late night snacking habit.

Day 24 - Wednesday (22/5/2013) 

I had lunch to go. Brought along a tupperware this time. Bought it from IKEA when I was there hunting for items for the studio's mini makeover. Had Japanese Cherry Snow for lunch.  Funny how about a month or two ago, I would cringe at the thought of eating vegetables. Now, I feel rather odd if I didn't get my veggie or fruit 'fix'. I'm a 'veggy addict' now.

A little video of me attempting (once more) poses. I still feel rather rolly polly and lack a certain grace but all in due time? Gotta start somewhere. I'm starting now. It's never too late. 

Day 25 - Thursday (23/5/2013) 

Gina and Regine showing us some serious yoga moves. Gina managed to do the scorpion pose but I didn't catch it on film. I managed to get Regine though. I love to watch Foo's Flow class. It's always inspiring! The students as well are super strong and super flexible. Something I aspire to achieve. It takes a lot of effort to make things look effortless.

Thinking of trying this out.

Thai spaghetti, had this for dinner. I'm actually kinda lovin' the food at the Juice and Salad Bar. I'm still keeping up with juicing. Love that too. Feel rather 'cleansed'. 

Day 26 - Friday (24/5/2013) 

ALERT - FAT RANT below! Please skip to day 27 to avoid rant.

I feel rather fat today. I've had 'I feel horribly fat' days before but today, I felt it particularly worse. I guess it was because I hurt my wrists doing chaturanga and lots of downward dogs. My wrists or was it my arms? Something about your arms being affected but you feel the pain at your wrists. 

So yes. Because I'm heavy, 86kg heavy I mean, I hurt myself. I haven't lost weight either. Not anything apparent. 4th week. I've got 8 weeks to go. (I need to change that mentality, that the number on the scale doesn't reflect who I am - but I can't really at the moment because I really do feel like crap). 

If I was bursting with life and walking on sunshine so to speak, I really wouldn't care about the weight, the clothes, the remarks. I'd stop probably hiding behind the counter! Most efforts in terms of diet failed. Well at least I picked up a few good habits, juicing in particular.

I'm wearing white today. Thats stepping outside my comfort zone believe it or not. I associate black with thin and, white with fat. General  knowledge of course that black is slimming. Today, since its a 'bad fat' day, I thought, "What the heck lah! Just wear white today!". I need to just embrace 'me'. Curvy, chubby, most of the time bubbly 'me'. Fight fire with fire. Fight the negativity with a little white positivity.

Oh, did I mention? Jo made me this video to work on my abs. I have a 6 pack, but not the muscle kind. I thought it wouldn't hurt to get trimmer on the waist, a little targeted yoga workout.


Day 27 - Saturday (25/5/2013) 

Lately, I realized that I don't have my time planned out well enough. I work part time at Surya Yoga but there are times when I work from home and do other Surya Yoga related work like design, blog updates, newsletter and a number of other things. I realized that I tend to overwhelm myself with the 'must do this now' attitude and also the 'must finish it as soon as possible' attitude. Rather efficient, but this lack of balance throws me off course.

I know some go through the same issue especially when they work from home. Personal time and work time gets mixed up. The lines are blurred. Boundaries must be made I feel. Jo suggested that I make a time table. Yes, it sorta makes me feel like I'm back in school, but oh what the heck, I should give it a shot. I'm allocating 'me' time and setting a few hours ago aside for work. That should make things a little more balanced.

A bought a daily planner from Popular.

This week's reward. I redeemed a Groupon for a massage session at Amante, which is right next door to Surya Yoga. Oh my, 10/10!!! The massage was fantastic! Totally impressed and hooked. This lady named Yang Yang gave me this really lovely massage. I think because I'm a little hefty, the 'strong' type of massage really worked! I do like 'mild' massages, but I guess sometimes I feel like I don't get my money's worth because giggles, I don't feel a thing. Guess it's the layers of fat. Oh well. But yes, Yang Yang is great! 10/10!

Day 28- Sunday (26/5/2013) 

Went to the Paperback Book Club's May meetup with Zyen. It's part of stepping outside my comfort zone and challenging myself. A little positivify segment. Truthfully, I'm deathly afraid of speaking in public. Well, even the 'little group' type of speaking. I also don't feel confident enough to get my point or opinion across. I think this project went rather well. I think I did okay and spoke up and gave my views. 

It was nice having Zyen around. Great support and I felt more relaxed. I felt totally drained though after the book club. I don't know, I just find it draining 'putting my brain to use'. Giggles, okay it's not THAT bad. My brain works fine with things I'm used to, but yes... I'm letting the more intellectual part of me come out. Overall, good week! Proud of myself.

This week, only managed to do 1 session of home practice. Hope to pick up the pace. Stay tuned for next week!

By the way, check this video out. I found it like 2 years ago I think. This mindful makeover suddenly reminded me of this Fat Rant video by Joy Nash.

Namaste

Elirus